Hey.
I could do the normal, "Sorry it's been awhile" thing, but the truth is, I haven't thought about blogging in a long time. How long? Well, since I last posted I guess.
The problem is, I have so much on my mind that blogging doesn't even crack the top ten list of things to do. It barely cracks the top 50.
What's on my mind? Glad you asked
1)Money. Cash. Moolah. Duckets. Benjamins. I need some. I've done a lot of work for a production company as a freelance tech and apparently they are running into money problems. I'm 90 days out on my furthest job and still no money. And we're not talking a few hundred bucks. Like many thousands of dollars. Thousands of dollars I could use to pay for things like my house and my a/c bill. I currently have 4 properties in escrow, but only one that will close this month. It's starting to get clinch the butthole tight around here.
2)I'm going to be a dad in about 7 weeks. Probably sooner. Why does that freak me out? See number 1. Seriously though, I'm going to be responsible for this fragile little life. Not just the providing either. How do you dicipline it and love it and form it into a contributing member of society? How do I introduce her to Jesus? What will I do if she's a patriot's fan? I'd feel really bad making her sleep outside, but hey, that's why patriot fans deserve.
3) I've never in my life felt like my lack of education held me back. When I worked at a church I always felt like what I produced outweighed any of that. And frankly it did. But I'm not in that world anymore. I love doing real estate. If I could pay all my bills without pulling a few thousand out of savings every month, I'd do it forever. But the truth is, it's not getting it done. I'm thinking I'm going to have to find something else. Not sure what though.
4) My walk with Christ has become very complacent. It's rare that I read my Bible. Like once in the last month rare. Even when I was working at Lennar I could always find time to read while I was at work. Now, it seems my life is so task filled I just try to get through as many tasks as I can and that one never seems to be on the top of the list. I was sitting with my good friend John Lee at my hockey game yesterday. I was telling him some of my anxieties with life. I mentioned how I don't necessarily have a lot of clients after the ones I'm dealing with right now and he said, "You know who's in control of that right?" And I replied, "Yeah, me. I just need to work harder." He said, "No, God's in control." It made me sad that I didn't even consider the possibility of that. I've blogged about God's will for our life before, but I think I forget how to have faith sometimes.
Well, that's why I don't blog much anymore. I hope it gets better, but it may not, but at least if it doesn't, you'll see this at the top and remember why you aren't getting your weekly dose of stupid videos and uneducated guesses.
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5 comments:
Jake, One of God's life lessons is that there are things to be learned in the "valleys." I don't know what they are for you. I know what they are and have been for me. You just have to listen and trust and obey. (I think I will write a song!) Believe it or not...when I look back on my life I am very thankful for the valleys. Remember you and Candice are prayed for every morning.
Oh, by the way, you know VonQueshia will be a Patriots fan. I remember a little boy who rooted for ND instead of TN, the Rockies instead of the Cubbies and the Colts instead of the Packers. "What goes around, comes around!" ha
hey jake! tis true, God is bigger than all of these things, though I as guilty as the next person of forgetting from time to time. I'm praying for these paychecks to come through...we love you guys!
Girded loins?
Jake thanks for sharing. I spent sometime praying for you and your family tonight. Hope even in this season of turmoil, change, and chaos Jesus makes his grace and presence evident and restorative to you.
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